San Diego Rescue Mission Night~

Well, we played here last night again. Many old and new friends...God spoke and it was a fun night.  Here are my notes of what went down:

 

The word of God tells us that God inhabits the praises of his people- Psalm 22~ I love to listen to praise music, it has helped me tremendously in the renewing of my mind, in the healing process that God has (and is) bringing me through . But what about /does HE inhabit while we are not praising Him? (i.e.: while working washing the dishes, cooking, exercise...do I expect Him there or not ? Do I just 'expect' to know He is present during a church service or here tonight?)

He tells u in Isaiah 41:10 I AM with you/ I will strengthen  you.  We know that Emmanuel is God with us.

But are we aware? am I aware ? Am I awake to God’s presence ALL THE TIME? And what does that mean for me? 

Most of our minds were trained by our circumstances - our parents friends-culture, tv ,media, life experiences and some it was good but really most of it has been untrue and unhelpful. My parents did not raise me with the word of God....did yours?  Most of this teaching was:  that I viewed and experienced the world as though God was not present, moment by moment or even at all.  Obviously He was there when we went to church or during the Christmas service right? But what about the rest of the time? If I look round this place the most I see besides you all and chairs and buildings is space--- the oxygen. This space is full of God.  That I can remember ALL the time that HE is present with me ALWAYS and that I am LOVED changes every minute of my life regardless of my struggle. my circumstance. my anything. 

Do we really believe this? Many times my prayer is God, help my unbelief…until my next God moment or breakthrough, or an encouragement by a sister r brother in Christ.  So I want to stay AWAKE to God’s presence…I will fail often- but I continue to remind myself…  

and I am not chasing a ‘feeling” or supernatural experience--(even though I confess I sometimes do..) but simply to know who Owns me and that He is always around with me and in me.  The extent of my  focus determines what I experience…and not experience.. in any given moment.  This is my prayer for all you guys- you are surrounded here by God- when you leave 

ROMANS 12:2 Do not conform any longer to the patterns of this world: lies/naivety/victim mentality/that I am not enough…But be transformed by the renewing of your mind. Then you will be able to test and approve what God’s will is- his good, pleasing and perfect will.

I don't know about you but My biggest jail can be my mind…my thoughts.   His Word also tells us to:

Seek First the Kingdom of God …….this begins in my mind. This is the choice to be AWAKE- Praying, reading His Word.  As I renew my mind with His word, believing God , seeking to be awake and aware of His presence all the time--

If I seek to submit to God/s reign in each and every moment- I transform ordinary moments into sacred moments.  ;)And my life,,our lives become a living sacrament.   I have a choice.  He helps me in my choices as I obey and submit toHim.  God is good.  All the time. Right now. 

Bullet Proof

Nothing to  loose...but my life I guess. Back to writing. Hoping to post daily here..

Sang for my ladle peeps from the Rescue Mission, tonight~ I love seeing
them rock out every Wednesday night.  Some just come in from the streets. They stand there and praise God, clap their hands and sing their hearts out before heading down to dinner and bible study.
The next day I go to work downtown and I often run into them hustling and bustling- they sometimes
don't recognize me :).  I guess we all fall into that- reading His Word, singing His songs, receiving His love through other's hands, possibly getting a piece of conviction pie and then the next day (or in the car ride home for that matter) forget all we just 'felt'.   It's a good thing feelings are not truth so that is a relief... I.want.to.remember.all.the.time.  Remember that His presence is always around and in me regardless of my feelings or circumstances.  I can cope with this: the mess, the kids arguing, my anxiety.  That all comes and goes- yet  He is always the same. Patient and sweet with me even when I am ugly.  Today I remember and choose Joy. That's right joy-killers, see ya later! 
Rejoice always!!

Rejoice in the Lord always. I will say it again: Rejoice! Philippians 4:4

ok- I'm going to rejoice with a dirty kitchen and children that are not obeying....:)

Your Love~

See the people walking down the street they seem so sad , the seem so lonely.
See the people walking down the street they seem so far and act so phony.
How will they sleep tonight? In their home?
How will we feel alright? All alone?

Take my hand and make me whole again-
HElp me understand your love~

I see the people and see myself be sad so bad- the streets are lonely.
Feeling heavy and about to cry yet I fight to hide my ugly.
How will I sleep tonight? In your home-my God?
You invite me not to hide anymore~

Take my hand again and make me whole-
Help me understand -the depth- of your love~

Why do I feel so old? And my heart longs to hold that
Between the spirit and the soul-Is something Beautiful~

New Songs

Well, all of a sudden it hit me: what the heck am I doing and not doing? I sincerely enjoy my life but incredibly miss making music. Soooo many years and always so much fun. Here we go then- I have the most amazing sound engenier in the industry and he's all mine :)
Tascam+guitarrita=COming ssssssssooonn.

Working the Discipline?

As you can see that is something I haven't been doing so well....... Between work, husband, kids, studies, parties, appointmets, vacations, gym, facebook, grocery shopping, NEED I SAY MORE?

SO it is time to SIMPLIFY........Yes it is-

I am hoping to be able to simplify so very much that I can actually come back here and comment on this silly blog I came up with. I look at it now and can only think how silly and arrogant I sounded a year ago: "let's read studybook and talk about it on a blog " blah blah blah.......booooring

I think now the direction will change to just my thoughts-

Whatever- '




Yes I have been working in a tedious and stressful trial for the past 2 months and can't wait for it to end. Can you tell?? ;)

Willpower has no defense against the careless word, the unguarded moment~

So...I have been referred by JP Moreland to a Celebration of Discipline book that has been on my shelf for a while now. I had ordered it because it had been recommended to me by a friend who seems to have it pretty together. It sort of ties in with what I am trying to accomplish...........: "To become Full" -To have a certain weight on my feet that does not allow the wind of circumstance or trouble to knock me even to the side a bit.

~I wear a scripture bracelet around my left arm to remind me of Proverbs 4:23, "Above all else, guard your heart, for it is the wellspring of life." I figure memorizing scripture will remind me of the goodness I long for. It does, of course, BUT there is so much more to it.


The reason I know this to be true is because I have been and still am greatly a "WILL" person. I WILL do that because I have discipline etc. So today I read that in the book of Colossians, Paul
tells of the self-imposed worship that this "will" can be. You see, we are so self-centered that any kind of dominion over a bad habit or success in say....... a diet or exercise and we think we are the bomb. We rock. We feel good. BUT what about when I scream at my little girl? Or when I get frustrated at my friend who is depressed and I just want to slap her?


Foster explains in his book how Jesus described this condition when He speaks of the external righteousness of the Pharisees. "Out of the abundance of the heart the mouth speaks......I tell you, on the day of judgement men will render account for every careless word they utter" (Matt. 12:34-36.) So by my will it works for a while but sooner or later out comes my "Mood" to reveal the true condition of my heart. Sooner or later What We Are comes out.

Can we get a PMS waiver? Please??


"Willpower has no defense against the careless word, the unguarded moment. The will has the same deficiency as the law--it can deal only with externals. It is incapable of bringing about the necessary transformation of the inner spirit." (Richard Foster)


Does anybody wonder why we "feel" better while on a Beth Moore study? The discipline necessary to follow through her workbook is approx 45 minutes of bible study per day!! Amazing learning and revelation happens!! Ahhhh.......the possibilities are endless..............
~I know it is the external power of God that does the transformation. How can I love someone I used to hate? Stop drinking like a lush? Forgive what I thought was unforgivable? Build a bridge and get over it? Now I am hooked --

"...but be transformed by the renewing of your mind..."

How we can strengthen our belief in God, Jesus Christ and all He told His apostles? His resurrection power and the fact that this power is available to us? I have to say that I am heavily influenced by the "world" view. It is easy to believe after a great sermon by my awesome pastor, a super inspirational movie or during a great worship concert~ THEN I go to work,-- I get busy, --I go shopping, --read my e-mail, --grab a magazine and my mind goes into passive mode-- A few days later I am having doubts or worse yet I am taken over by frustation and anger over something I have no control of.

~But I haven't yet aquired the discipline of spending enough time alone with My God.

~Enough discipline to finish this book and read it again to really let it sink in.

~Time to lay hands on my children, pray for them and bless them each morning as they go off to school or summer camp.

Today's challenge is going to be: "Working on THE Discipline" ~It needs to be intentional. Like getting to the gym and having something good and organic for breakfast.

" In any human endeavor, repetitive excercise and practice bring skill and excellence. The same thing is true of study. We often correctly approach study specifically for some direct end- preparing a lesson or learning a topic covered in a book. But study should also be approached as a set of training activities, as SPIRITUAL and INTELLECTUAL excercises. Study is a discipline that strengthens the mind and enriches the soul." ....................................."If all you do is read simple books or those that overemphazise stories or practical application, you'll never learn to think for yourself as a mature Christian, nor will you develop a trained mind." (J.P. Moreland Quote)

"THIS guy is HEAVY DUTY!!" (My Quote)